To be succinct: I paint God's mistake.
Until 1995, my understanding of error was still very limited. I assumed that error was "sin that was evil" and that God was without error. That changed when I was given a message during a paranormal moment. I was told GOD IS FORGIVEN. My research since then has been to unravel the meaning and feeling of that phrase. All of my artistic work deals with this provocative new concept, and how it is relevant to time, human morality, and mortality.
HOW IT STARTED
My confrontation with innocence appropriately began at the naïve age of 8 after my very first piano lesson. As I rode my bike home, enchanted with the magic of my musical beginnings, my soul suddenly opened to a dimension of TIME where I was communing with something much greater than myself. I remember my absolute awe. One could say I was paralyzed by its splendor, yet I never stopped riding my bicycle. As I returned to my surroundings fear began to grip me. I remember saying, “Oh, I hope I am good enough!” A different part of my mind that had not witnessed this event asked me, “Good enough for what?” I responded with “I don’t know” suddenly recognizing my commitment to invest my entire life toward something that I did not understand.
THE VALUE OF ERROR
What I didn’t understand was how error could be valuable. True Error is unintended loss; which manifests as our mortal existence, and our moral crisis. Our mortality is not the intent of death, but our personal destiny is annihilation. As conscious individuals we are descendants of a broken existence; a dichotomy where each of us is innocent of creating our mortal destiny, but vulnerable to condemning our connection with others who “created us to die” without our permission. Our “error” is our ownership of blame for mortality, which is not the power over death; it is our power over cruelty.
So, why paint about God is Forgiven? Why not carry this forward with its musical association? Actually, I do through my work www.insidethemusic.com.
However, when dealing with God’s mistake the tools of communication must also include mortality as the laughter at Death, and the respect for transcending cruelty. Music never decays and is a perfect metaphor for innocent sentient consciousness, but visual art is fragile and susceptible to annihilation just like mortal beings. I use 2-D paintings because we always view their front with the backside being invisible. This front-back relationship is friction which is relevant to music, and mortality, but offers the laughter at Death which we never see because we exist on the side that we can observe.